Writing my Autobio on Liquid Paper

Hideous Injustice #440---The dim bulb at the Barnes & Noble doesn't believe that i am a bonified, certified educator of impressionable youth. This evening, i attempted to purchase two books using my Educator's Discount card, but the fella wouldn't give me a nod of admiration; i would have settled for a grunt in my general direction, some inkling that i was in front of him and intended to make a purchase. He didn't believe i was a teacher despite showing him the appropriate identification, and i am forced to consider this to be a life-altering event.

Chyna Doll? Joanie Laurer? *Sniff Sniff* identity crisis on toasted rye with a side of reckless abandon, hold the mustard. My wife (THE WHAMMINESS CANNOT TAKE YOUR DOG FOR A WALK!! I DO NOT SCOOP THE POOP!) espied her in Uncle Zoogie and Uncle Vinny's Bar in CT several years ago. Someone asked if she was really Chyna, she turned to my future bride and asked, "I don't know who that is. Do you??"...write your own ending to this intro, kids.

Gonna go watch "Punky Brewster" now...